When do people decide whether or not they want to become friends? During their first four minutes together, according to a book by Dr. Leonard Zunin. In his book, “Contact: The First Four minutes’’, he offers this advice to anyone interested in starting new friendships: “____(1)____ A lot of people’s whole lives would change if they did just that.”

　　You may have noticed that the average person does not give his undivided attention to someone he has just met. ____(2)____ If anyone has ever done this to you, you probably did not like him very much.

　　When we are introduced to new people, the author suggests, we should try to appear friendly and self-confident. In general, he says, “People like people who like themselves1.”

　　On the other hand, we should not make the other person think we are too sure of ourselves. It is important to appear interested and sympathetic, realizing that the other person has his own needs, fears, and hopes.

　　Hearing such advice, one might say, “But I’m not a friendly, sell-confident person. That’s not my nature. It would be dishonest for me to act that way. ”

　　____(3)____ We can become accustomed to any changes we choose to make in our personality. “It is like getting used to a new car. It may be unfamiliar at first, but it goes much better than the old one.”

　　But isn’t it dishonest to give the appearance of friendly self-confidence when we don't actually feel that way? Perhaps, but according to Dr. Zunin, “total honesty”is not always good for social relationships2, especially during the first few minutes of contact. There is a lime for everything, and a certain amount of play-acting may be best for the first few minutes of contact with a stranger3. That is not the time to complain about one's health or to mention faults one finds in other people. It is not the time to tell the whole truth about one's opinions and impressions.

　　____(4)____ For a husband and wife or a parent and child, problems often arise during their first four minutes together after they have been apart. Dr. Zunin suggests that these first few minutes together be treated with care. If there are unpleasant matters to be discussed, they should be dealt with later.

　　The author says that interpersonal relations should be taught as a required course1 in every school, along with reading, writing, and mathematics. ____(5)____ That is at least as important as how much we know.

　　詞匯：

　　undivided / ˌʌndɪˈvaɪdɪd / adj.不分散的，專一的

　　personality / ˌpə:səˈnæliti /n.個性，人格

　　accustomed / əˈkʌstəmd / adj.慣常的

　　注釋：

　　1.People like people who like themselves.:人們喜歡那些有自信心的人。這里的who like themselves不作“喜歡自己”解，根據(jù)上下文，可以解釋為“有自信的人”。

　　2.“total honesty”is not always good for social relationships:在社會關(guān)系上“絕對的誠實”并非總是好的。

　　3.... a certain amount of play-acting may be best for the first few minutes of contact with a stranger.：……在和陌生人接觸的頭幾分鐘，適當(dāng)演一點(diǎn)兒戲是合適不過的了。

　　4.apply to:適用于

　　5.required course ：必修課

　　練習(xí)：

　　A.In reply, Dr. Zunin would claim that a little practice can help us feel comfortable about changing our social habits.

　　B.Much of what has been said about strangers also applies to4 relationships with family members and friends.

　　C.In his opinion, success in life depends mainly on how we get along with other people.

　　D.Every time you meet someone in a social situation, give him your undivided attention for four minutes.

　　E.He keeps looking over the other person’s shoulder, as if hoping to find someone more interesting in another part of the room.

　　F.He is eager to make friends with everyone.

　　答案與題解：

　　1.D木文主要講與人初次見而初四分鐘對下人際交往的重要性。文章開頭以自問自答的形式提出主題，然后說Leonard Zunin博士在書中向任何想交新朋友的人提出一條建議。什么建議呢?比較一下只有把D放在這里合適，因為人們常用祈使句向別人提建議，D是一個祈使句，它的意思是：“每次你在社交場合遇到什么人時，全神貫注地注意他四分鐘�！焙蜕舷挛目偹歼B貫。